The most precious jewels you'll ever have around your neck are the arms of your children!
Boy: Have you seen my pills? They 're labelled LSD.
Grandmother: Never mind about your pills! Have you seen the dragon in the kitchen?`
Did you hear about the two Mexican firefighters- Jose and Hose B?
Man 1: Shall we have a friendly game of cards?
Man 2: No, let's play bridge!
Show me where Stalin is buried and I'll show you a Communist plot!
How can you tell a Sumo wrestler from a feminist?
A Sumo wrestler shaves his legs!
How does a funeral director sign his correspondence? Yours eventually...
Did your hear about the cemetery that raised its burial cost? It blamed the cost of living!
Master, is it proper for a monk to use email?
Sure as long as there are no 'attachments'!
I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road without being questioned about their motives!
