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Newage sign by Traffic Police:
Drink and Drive; we will show you new bars!

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Auto reply message of a drunkard:
Can't talk now...
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Alcohol you later!

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People are telling me to drink LESS whiskey... but I've never heard of that brand!

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Good whiskey makes your soul crawl out of its hiding place!

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They say follow your heart.
I followed my heart and it led me to the wine shop!

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I quit drinking yesterday, but tonight...
I celebrate my comeback!

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Half the day, I wonder if it is too late for coffee.
The other half, I wonder if it is too early for alcohol!

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If you combine 'Whiskey' and 'Dinner'.
you get a 'Winner'!

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If you anything on your mind then come let's drink about it!

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I suppose I better get up, get ready and hit the gym.
Sorry typo, I meant gin!

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