Son: I hit a guy on road.
Punjabi Mom ignores.
Son: Mummy Sabzi Gir Gayi Bed Pe.
Punjabi Mom: Idhar Aa Kutteya, Tainu Roti Vi Nahi Khani Aaundi!
A boy proposed a girl:
"I love you.
I was in love with you from the first time I saw you. I can do anything for you. You are my first and last wish. You are everything for me. I wish we marry and live happily forever. Please don't say no to me. You are my life."
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Girl: Veere! Mainu Angreji Nahi Aaundi!
Pappu: Kya Tum Mujhse Friendship Karogi?
Girl: Main Itni Jaldi Trust Nahi Kar Sakti.
Pappu: Na Tu Trust Nu Mere Kol 10 Lakh Di Kameti Pauni Aa, Jo Main Lai Ke Bhaj Jau!
A Punjaban's Apology:
I am sorry but Galti Kutteya Teri Si!
Best Traffic Advertisement of Year:
Picture of Lord Ganesha holding a helmet with a saying, "Take care of your head, not everyone gets a replacement like me."
Punjabi version - Lord Ganesha holding a helmet and saying, "Ullu De Pattho... Helmet Pa Lo... Tuhada Bapu Shivji Nahi Hai!"
Sab Dosta Nu Hath Jod Ke Benti Hai Ki Aaun Wale Dina Vich Activa, Motorcycle Holi Chalao...
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Eh Na Hove Aage Chhabeel Lagi Hove Te Tuhanu Pata Hi Na Lage!
A Punjabi woman in London talking in English to a doctor about her sick child:
My Kaka is ill Ek Week Da,
Na Eat Da, Na Sleep Da,
Bas Weep Da Te Cheek Da,
Nale Nak Vi Leak Da!
Fakir: Koi Baba Nu Roti Khawa Do
Baba Chawal Vi Kha Lena
Baba Icecream Vi Kha Lenda
Baba Burger Vi Kha Lenda
Baba Sandwich Vi Kha Lenda
Lady: Baba Juttiyan Vi Kha Lenda Ke Nahin?
Fakir: Na Puttar, Sakht Cheez Di Manai Hai...!
Enjoy the finest of Punjabi poetry:
Once there was a Crow;
Chandigarh Vich Baitha Si Oh.
Usne Peg Laye Si Do;
O Talli Geya Si Ho.
Ik Chiri Rahi Si Ro;
Crow Ne Ched Ditti Oh.
Utto Aa Geya Chiri Da Peo;
Chiri De Peo Ne Phir Kuttya Crow.
Crow Sharminda Geya Si Ho;
Hun Chiri Nu Bhain Kehnda Oh!
Ajj Kal De Zamaane Vichh Maape Apne Baccheyan Da Bahut Kehna Mande Hann!