Clean Jokes

Sam decided to go hunting with his buddy, Mark. They loaded up Mark’s truck and headed north. After driving for a few hours, they got caught in a terrible storm. They pulled into a nearby farm and asked the attractive lady...

A woman was getting her hair done at the salon for a trip to Rome with her husband. She mentioned the trip to the hairdresser, who responded, "Rome? Why would anyone want to go...

While making his rounds, a doctor points out an X-Ray to a group of medical students
"As you can see," the doctor says, "the patient limps because his left fibula and tibia are...

This guy's father dies, so he goes to the undertaker and tells him he wants the best of everything for his father. The funeral is absolutely beautiful, and the guy is extremely pleased...

So the boss gets a hot new secretary, and almost immediately they start having an affair. However, within a few weeks, he is feeling displeased at the way she is performing...

Wife: Where are you going?
Husband: Watch the game at the pub.
Wife: Why don't you watch it with me?
Husband: I want to watch it with my friends.
Wife: So I mean nothing to you?
Husband: OK, OK. I am staying...

A husband and wife are sitting on the couch when the husband looks over and says, "Honey, if I died, would you get remarried?"
The wife thinks about it and says, "Well, we have a beautiful house, and I don't want to be alone, so...

I took an elevator up to the 69th floor for a meeting and as I was getting out, the operator said, "Have a good day, son."
I grumbled, "Don't call me son. You're not my dad."
He scratched his head...

A pirate walked into a bar and the bartender said, "Hey, I haven't seen you in a while. What happened? You look terrible."
"What do you mean?" said the pirate, "I feel fine...

A sophisticated, well-dressed woman walks into a shop that sells very expensive Persian rugs. She looks around, spots a beautiful rug, and walks over to inspect it...